every day that passes, i wonder if i became a better muslim or worse. tiap2 hari ada benda yang aku perlu urus utk org lain, dan aku berjaya urus. tapi bila masuk bab diri sendiri, byk sgt benda yang flaw. i honestly dont know where the mistake lies. adakah aku dah tak ikhlas mentarbiyah diri? adakah ego dan rasa diri dah cukup baik?
orang akan mula jadi bodoh bila rasa diri pandai, orang akan mula jadi jahat bila rasa diri baik. maybe aku secara tak sedar rasa konon2 baik. tiap2 hari ada je org tny pendapat, hampir setiap minggu ada program yang aku kena bagi penyampaian. mungkin sbb tu aku rasa cukup baik. maybe i need someone to really tell me and remind me that, i do mistakes every single day. so much that my good deeds cant even cover up. so much responsibilites that i neglect. someone.
but i do know all that. so i dont really know what i need.
need something to make sure i maintain doing my daily deeds consistently. sebab kunci kejayaan adalah istiqamah. dan aku buat masa ni tak ada benda tu.
i understand life is a struggle. and i need to go on... i
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